[the quest for the cucumber gimlet]

Last night I went out, and today I feel like a delirious zombie. Not because I’m hung over, mind you, but because I’m sleep-deprived. Hashtag You Know You’re Old When. Anyway, the main reason for going out (besides the fact that it was Friday and I wanted to get my drank on) was to try…

[conversations with my sister]

So I got distracted sending a picture of a package of Uncle Ben’s Santa Fe rice along with a stupid caption calling him a “sassy bastard”  to some friends and I totally forgot why I picked up my phone in the first place. No, I’m not drunk. Sadly, I do stupid shit like this all…

[my first time]

…Golfing, you pervs. Get your heads out of the gutter. In the interest of clarity, I should say I didn’t actually go golfing; I went to the driving range with my friend, Jen. It was the first golf-related activity I did that wasn’t Putt Putt. Since Jen got there before me, she went ahead and got…

[i knew i was in the wrong state!]

In an effort to get out of my comfort zone and “put myself out there” more when it comes to dating, I took a baby step and opened up a profile on OKCupid. That’s pretty much all I will say on the subject, right after I share with you what I got in my email…

[dear justin silver: please marry me]

So it looks like the whole Mike Rowe thing didn’t work out. But it’s okay. I’m a big girl. After a pint of Ben & Jerry’s and taking the appropriate amount of time out to grieve a non-acceptance of a ridiculous marriage proposal to a pseudo-celebrity, I’m ready to get back in the game. I’ve moved…

[tv networks, listen up]

Back in college, my friend Jenna and I had two ideas that would have been our golden tickets had we acted on them. We didn’t, because while they did seem like good ideas, they also sounded really stupid. And I’m pretty sure we were drunk when we came up with both. Turned out the joke was…

[proof that filters can make crappy pictures look amazing pt. 2]

This series I’ll cryptically title, Life. Will it cause you to ponder the meaning of life? Will it allow you to reflect on how all species are somehow related? Will it make you think of the circle of life? Who knows! That’s why I’m calling it Life. Each picture will speak to each person in a different way….

[dear mike rowe: please marry me]

    Dear Mike,   Please marry me.    I realize I would have been better off posting this on 2/29, when it is tradition for women to propose to men, but what can I say? I’m slow on the uptake sometimes. Please don’t let that be a factor in deciding whether or not to accept…

[shit single girls say when shopping for baby showers]

Last weekend, I went to a baby shower. While shopping for a gift, my friend Ali and I realized we were way out of our element. It was a new and strange world of diapers, onesies, bibs, and burpies. A few snippets from our conversation: “What does this 1 mean? What’s a 4? Are these…